heatherwitch:

I get dozens of asks on how to find the right deity, or how to find “your” deity. I’ll just cover the basics here (mainly so my lazy ass can link to it later instead of typing this over and over). Quick note: Some of this may be UPG or my personal opinions. I welcome you to share your own, but don’t be rude about it.  

Quick Vocab:

• Worship vs. Working With. I use these interchangeably. I consider both of them to be talking about the relationship and connection you kindle with a deity. “Working with” does not mean “utilizing in spells as ingredients”. 
• Patron ____. Wicca has different views as to what a patron or matron is compared to most of the witchcraft world. One view is: when you pick a patron deity it means a bond that will last a lifetime. Another view is that patron deities are not ones that you personally identify with, but rather are ones that relate to your lifestyle/profession/occupation. 
• Devotee. Being a devotee is a way to work more closely with one, or a few, deities without committing to it for a lifetime. It simply means that you focus more of your worship and time on them, but you can still worship other deities too.
• Pantheon. A group of deities, usually based on the culture they come from. The names can sometimes vary (Greek = Hellenic, Egyptian = Kemetic, etc.)

Some misconceptions and false expectations:

• “My deity”. A deity is not yours. You can work with them, worship them, what have you. But they are not yours to claim. Here’s some different way to phrase it: “I am a devotee of ___” or “____ is the deity I work most closely with”. 
• Everybody needs a deity. You don’t need to work with deities to be a witch. Witchcraft does not equal religion. Religion *can* be tied into witchcraft if you want though! Don’t force yourself to work with deities just because you see other people doing it!
• Deities will talk to you. Sometimes, but not usually, or not in the way you expect. You aren’t likely to hear a voice in response, or to confirm that they want to work with you. You’re more likely to get: A sign of some sort, a certain feeling (warm and tingly or emotional, for example) or possibly your inner voice seems a bit different and you think it may be influenced.
• You’ll know when your deities like offerings, or hear your prayers. Again, sometimes, but not usually. Not getting a response doesn’t mean you’re getting the cold shoulder. Prayers, offerings and other things don’t always garner a response, or an immediate response.
• You have to pick one pantheon. Not at all, however you do have to be respectful of the pantheons each deity comes from. You can’t pick and choose which aspects of the deity you want. I personally stick to one pantheon because it’s simple and fits for me.
• Deities from closed cultures are “calling to you”. Listen, I highly doubt that a deity from a culture that is closed, usually due to outsiders (read: white people) being oppressive and awful to them, would want to work with you. Check yourself and make sure it’s not just the aesthetic value or mysteriousness that’s drawing you to them. ALSO! You may be drawn to characteristics that they have, and there is most likely a similar deity in an open culture. Here’s a link to the google question “what cultures are closed?”

On finding a deity to work with:

I often get asked “how to I figure out which deity is a good fit for me?” The easy answer: I have no clue. Only you know what works best for you, and what’s a good fit. However, here’s some good methods:

• Research the pantheons. The Greek, Egyptian and Norse are the ones that often have the most information (and are all open practices). See if one in particular calls to you. Then spend time reading about each deity.
• Look at what traits you are called to. Self love? Fierceness? Feelings of home? You can literally just google “gods/deities of ____”. You can even add a specific pantheon to the end if you’ve narrowed it down.

Reaching out to that deity:

The “proper” way to do this varies per pantheon, so do your research! Google and books are your friend. And there’s usually a lot of resources for beginners on tumblr as well. The typical ways include:

• An offering. Usually there’s some sort of information on traditional offerings, which you can never go wrong with. Sometimes certain offerings are offensive/not given to certain types of deities.
• A prayer. It’s totally okay to look up “____ (deity’s name) prayer” for a format if you’re daunted by writing your own. It can also just be more of an explanation on why you want to worship them.
• Ask for a sign. I don’t do this and hesitate to even recommend it because it can be SO hard to figure out what’s actually a sign. I’d suggest knowing the basics of the deities sacred animals, plants and colors so you have an idea of what to look for.
• Just start worshiping. You don’t have to have a formal relationship with every deity to worship them. I do recommend forming a relationship with them before becoming their devotee.

My go-to resource for the Hellenic Pantheon is this site, I’m unsure for the other ones as I don’t work with the deities within them!